I say Toronto, you say T'ronnah

Three things occurred to me as the plane circled Toronto in preparation for landing. The city's extensive highways with neighbouring high-rise apartment blocks reminded me so much of David Cronenberg's Crash, which was filmed in the city. Secondly, the CN Tower stuck out like a shining candle at the edge of Lake Ontario. And thirdly, from the air, everything else looked pretty much like Chicago.

In Canada, customs and immigration is done by the same person. Not sure why. But when I mentioned to the immigration officer that I had brought alcohol as a gift for Ryan and Brendan, she advised me that I should bring it into Canada for myself to share with friends, thereby avoiding the considerable tax that would otherwise be payable... And she then let me pass through without paying a cent. What a contrast to my Chicago experience. And in that little story I think I can sum up the Ontario way. There may be a lot of red-tape and beauraucracy, but the people are lovely and liberal, and lacking the red-state madness that I could find only a few hundred kilometres south.

Let me give some examples of Ontario red-tape. This is a province where clubs stop serving alcohol at 2AM. In fact, I couldn't even get a soft-drink past 2AM... Only bottled water. It's a place where you can legally sunbake nude on designated beaches, but you will be fined for entering the water nude at the very same beach (not that I did any of this, just reporting the facts m'am). It's also a place where one buys beer, and only beer, from "The Beer Store"; wine, and only wine, from "The Wine Rack"; or anything alcoholic from the state-owned bottle shops which are hard to find. And yep, they close early, even in summer.

Brendan kindly met me at the airport. It was so good to find a familiar face in a sea of North American unfamiliarity. Brendan seems to have settled right into Canadian life. His vast knowledge of little historical facts, as well as his own take on Canadian people, places, and life, all from an Australian point-of-view, was invaluable over the next week.

But first we had to navigate our way out of the airport. Some taxi-drivers were picketing at the airport in protest against the airport authority's plan to limit which company's taxi drivers could pick up from the airport. There were only about fifteen protestors, but they had successfully blocked all traffic leading out of the airport, which in turn blocked all traffic leading in. We waited at the front of the taxi queue for 30 minutes. During that time only a handful of cars were let through. The media reported that people were missing flights left, right, and centre because they couldn't even get into the airport. But the curious thing is that there were so many opportunities for the cars to accelerate through gaps in the protest, yet they didn't. Strange. I reflected on how back home the problem would have been solved with everyone being arrested and the highway reopened. But not in bleeding-heart liberal Canadia, as the Americans might say.

On the Monday afternoon that I arrived, and also the following day, Brendan took me on a couple of walking tours around Richmond, the area where he and Ryan live. This is a redeveloped inner-city suburb not far removed from Darlinghurst or Fortitude Valley. The thing that struck me most of all about Toronto is how undistinctive the city looks. After Japan there was plenty more greenery, but still the inner-city was mostly concrete pavement and older brick buildings. I felt I could have been anywhere in North America. It's no wonder that so many American films are now made in Toronto. But if pushed to describe Toronto in terms of another city, I'd say it's very much like Melbourne. Maybe that's because both cities have trams, or street-cars as they are called in Toronto.

One of the things I loved about Toronto, and which was very evident in Richmond, was how young, hip, and sassy all the people are. It's all very Jump Street, albeit fifteen years later. Canada is proud of its tolerant society and has embraced migrants from all over the world. It may be hard to imagine a place more multicultural than Melbourne but this is truly the case. The people are a beautifully diverse mix of races and cultures. Then there is this very distinctive Canadian look, which I can only describe as the melting-pot product of a few generations of inter-breeding with the result being unbelievably stunning. Oh, and Torontonians love a tattoo, a goatee, and a masseur sandle... And quite often all three at once. God help these people if they ever visit Japan.

On Wednesday Brendan and I drove around Lake Ontario in the direction of Niagara Falls. Before visiting the falls, we stopped at a picturesque little town called Niagara-on-the-Lake. Canadians describe it as the most beautiful town in all of Canada, and it's easy to see why. It's like wandering into the North American section of an amusement park like Dreamworld. Picture pretty and spotlessly clean.

We were determined to avoid an American-style family restaurant, but in the end our hunger won out over our principles. I ordered a steak, which came with salad and fries, and could have fed a family of 5, and all it cost me was AUD $13.

After lunch we wandered along the street checking out little stores and boutiques that were usually impeccably decorated. I won't say anything about the daggy 1970s Dawn-of-the-Dead style mannequins in one window - just check out my photo on Flickr. Nothing really took our fancy shopping-wise, but we both agreed that Carmel and Veronica would love Niagara-on-the-Lake. Think Bangalow, but cuter!

The one shop I did visit was a candy store. They made the best-tasting fudge right on the premises. Unfortunately the shop clerk was a little humourless, and so my enquire about low-fat fudge products seemed lost on her. Poor dear. But I was very interested in the maple sugar candy. When I was little, our Canadian family friend Teena used to send me these sweets. Basically, they're just maple sugar compacted into a fancy shape. Their melt-in-the-mouth texture is to-die-for. I did buy a couple of boxes but I'm very unsure how many will find their way back home.

Next stop was Niagara Falls. Now this was pretty cool. Photos and movies just don't do any justice to how magnificient the falls are in real life. I was astounded by the volume of water passing over the falls. Buckets of it. ;-)

We wandered along the Canadian side for quite a distance (passing a spot that is significant if you have seen Superman II), and I took many many photographs along the way. But you know what, after about ten minutes I realised that it's just a big waterfall, and they're wasn't too much more to it than that. It sounds silly, but it's true. I think generations of visitors have felt the same way, explaining the gauche high-rises that have sprung up behind the falls, and which make the Gold Coast look classy in comparison.

We were pressed for time so unfortunately didn't make it on to the Maid of the Mist. I guess it's good to save something for next time! But we did experience one of Niagara's unintended highlights. There was no end to the huge 6-wheel SUVs that are a reminder, if one needed any, of just how close we were to the States. Forget Hummers. Click the photos link to check out the size of these tanks.

On Thursday we decided to take advantage of the car that we still had on hire, and put it to good use by heading out to Best Buy. This is a huge American chain store that guarantees to sell electronics, CDs, and DVDs, at the cheapest price. The prices were definitely cheaper than every other store I visited but there were few real bargains. Canada has a GST, and the provinces also have sales taxes. The annoying thing is that unlike Australia, quoted prices are not tax-inclusive. So once you add the 15% of taxes a good price suddenly seems no better or the same as Australia. For DVDs, I think you can't go past American or Canadian mail-order houses on pricing. Which is a shame because it is much more fun shopping for real!

After our Best Buy experience we went to the CN Tower, which is the world's tallest freestanding structure and has the highest man-made observation deck. The view was pretty impressive, but I prefer the view from elsewhere in Toronto, partly because you can see the tower from there. There is an observation deck or restaurant in the Manulife Centre that we never got to visit. Apparently it's view is a little more human than that from CN Tower because one is so much closer to the ground. Still, the CN Tower is a must-see on any visitor's list, especially to appreciate the size of the structure. I loved the photographs and videos detailing the construction of the tower. They highlighted to me just how much Toronto has changed over the last thirty years.

Friday was our day to visit Toronto Island. Brendan and I rode Ryan's bicycles to the lakefront, and caught a five-minute ferry ride across to the island. The whole island is mostly parkland, but also has beaches, a small village, a children's theme park, and at one end an airport just to complete its list of multi-purpose functions.

From Friday night until pretty much when I left Toronto, most of our time was spent in and adjacent to "the Village". This is Toronto's designated gay area, centering on Church, Yonge, and Welleslley streets. Toronto Pridejust happened to be on the week that I was in town. Isn't it funny how things work out? Actually, truth be told, I had to decide between visiting New York or Toronto for Pride, both festivals being on at the same time, but chose the latter because it would be more fun with friends.

In retrospect I was a little disappointed with Toronto's Pride, but only because I have been spoiled by how Sydney does it. There really isn't a cultural festival, like there is in Sydney, to accompany the endless street parties and dance events. So most of our time was spent in and out of bars etc. Not that that's a problem, but still it's not a patch on Sydney. And the parade was a little embarrassing. Just a bunch of dreadful, sequined poofs and saggy-titted - ed dykes walking down a grimey inner-city street. There is a lot to be said for holding a parade at night-time, least of all being able to set off fireworks!

We started off the Saturday evening by attending a fab little bbq in the smallest town house I have ever visited. Lots of Quebecois (or Quebbies, pronounced Kebbies, as Gavin Green is fond of saying). From there we went to Joy, a party held at Guvernment (a set of purpose-built lake-side warehouses). It reminded me a lot of Sydney's Hordern Pavilion but with much prettier people. The North American career must spend countless hours to look so good. I was reminded of the Franz Ferdinand song "Michael", and specifically the line "beautiful boys on a beautiful dance floor" etc etc. I kept wondering if I'd wandered onto an Abercrombie & Fitch . It was a long, but very fun night.

Understandably, Sunday was a slow day for all concerned. We managed to make it back to the Village for afternoon drinks but felt a little stressed by the crowd numbers, and the knock-ness.

By Sunday night it was just Brendan and I heading out on the town. For a laugh, and because there is nothing like it in Australia, we went to Remington's, which is a gay . As might be expected, it was as tacky as any other and we left after a few drinks. Brendan then bailed, and if I had half a working brain I would have done the same... Instead I headed back to Guvernment for that night's Revival party. The party was pretty good, with some fab shows and a live performance by Suzanne Palmer (she sang that Hide U song a few years back). And what a surprise to receive a phone call from Dad at 5AM. Perhaps he forgot that Toronto is 14 hours behind Australia. Thankfully, I wasn't sleeping. Perhaps I should purchase a clock, set it to North American time, and Fedex it home?

Later on Monday afternoon I ventured out for my second major Torontonian shopping experience taking in the Eaton Centre, Sears, and Hudson's Bay Company. The Eaton Centre is a huge interior shopping mall in the centre of town that reminded me so much of the Myer Centre. I went there to purchase some new luggage. Dad convinced me to purchase some cheap luggage back home. One of the bags didn't even make it out the front door without snapping a handle. By the time I made the Tokyo-Toronto flight I only had one working handle out of four. Fortunately Sears came to the rescue. To me, Sears (which I have nicknamed Sears's), is very much like Myer back home. But Sears is in America, and Canadians are almost always on edge about anything American preferring Canadian stores where possible (which explains the Starbucks clone called Second Cup that is everywhere in Canada). The Canadian competitor to Sears is Hudson's Bay Company. Kind of like the British East India Company,
Hbc is Canada's oldest company which started with a 17th century license to hunt for something or other. I did go to Hbc, and one of their better/bigger stores in fact, but I wasn't impressed. Hbc is reminiscient of a bad McDonnell & East store, or at best the dowdier sections of Brisbane's old David Jones store.

On the Tuesday morning, just before leaving Toronto for Ottawa, Brendan and I went to the Famous Players googolplex to see Batman Begins. The flick played on an IMAX screen, and it may have had a larger format print... But the sound was certainly much better than normal cinemas. Before we watched the movie we got to enjoy a 10-minute laser light show spectacle highlighting the cinema's features. It was very cool, if a little exhausting.

Batman Begins is pretty good. I did feel the story to be a little too familiar. It suffers from the problem that plagues most first comic adaptations in that so much time is spent telling the hero's backstory, and very little on new drama. But the film ends with a set-up for a sequel that will probably be much better than this film. I still think I prefer Tim Burton's vision of Gotham, but almost every other aspect of the film, including Christian Bale as Batman, is second-to-none. And how cool that every lead actor is British, excepting Katie Holmes and Morgan Freeman of course.

So that pretty much wraps up my time in Toronto. It's the only place I have visited so far where I would have liked to stay another week or two. But perhaps I can get back there later this year.

On a personal note, my time in Toronto also came at the time when I started to feel a little home-sick. I found myself texting and calling a few people back home, before realising how I was feeling. But rather than dwell on it, I have realised it's best to take advantage of every experience that travelling can provide, as suggested in the parting advice from Doug and a few other friends back home. It'll only be a matter of days before I am back on top of things.

Two days ago I arrived in Ottawa. Which is like Canberra, but prettier, and with purpose. More soon.